from my state – literally and figuratively – and other places. i'm not in florida any more, but i haven't given up the sunshine.


little light show

one of my fondest memories as a child is when mammy - my grandmother – would poke holes in the top of a mason jar and take me outside to collect fireflies. i’d fill the jar with the little packets of flying light. we set them next to the bed and i'd watch them flicker until i fell asleep.

tonight – while i was standing among a few small trees in the middle of washington, dc - fireflies were dancing in the rain.

happy birthday to me.


an open letter to the mayor of key west

as monday, july 4 is an observed holiday for which many persons employed in the u.s. are exempt from work, i understand some may consider friday, july 1 through monday, july 4, collectively, as the ‘july fourth weekend.

with all due respect to the declaration of the independence of our nation, it seems the rights to life, liberty and the pursuit happiness, particularly under the current administration, have been significantly hampered. similarly, history has proven that our nation does not in fact consider all men created equal. and women and gays are in a lower caste all together.

for this reason - and as suitable for the long weekend following june 30 - i submit that in the city of key west, july 1-4 be declared the dirty thirty birthday weekend.

all those in favor …

please don't worry

'cause i'm alright. see i'm staying here at the ritz tonight. (credit: lindsay and sugarland)

it’s good to be in our country’s capital when the president isn’t here. i just feel safer.


well excuse me for wearing cargo shorts

… and her for wearing a baseball cap.

so this weekend at the laundromat this guy looked at linds and i and asked, ‘who’s the man?’ we walked away. he followed, sat down next to us and continued: ‘who’s the man … you know, in your relationship?’ moments later another guy walked up saying ‘what you’re doing isn’t right. leave them alone and go talk to your buddy.’ there really are good people in the world.

the man who spoke up for us later told me he was embarrassed and didn’t want us to think all black people are as ignorant and the harasser. well of course i would never think that. but the truth is, i’ve entertained some of the most ridiculous and ignorant questions from nice looking white boys - sometimes with the seemingly obligatory lesbian 101, other times with simple retort. one has to wonder if it’s different coming from them because of who they are or because the questions are asked in ‘friendly’ territory.

either way the shock is always the same. and the frustration of the moment is second only to the morning after - when i wake up and think of a much wittier response than whatever actually fell out of my mouth at the time.


an invitation to dinner

i ran across the story of marc horowitz in a national daily. writing “dinner w/ marc” - with a phone number - on a whiteboard for crate & barrel’s august catalog photo shoot didn’t just add a nice, homey touch. it led catalog browsers to call to invite him to dinner … which led to the national dinner tour.

let’s send him an invitation … to play along, send your rsvp and a reason why marc should come to see us


more than boxing

i’m not a boxing fan, and i say if you haven’t seen it already, go now, rent and watch million dollar baby. not only are there plenty of opportunities to view the lovely hilary swank a la gi jane, clint eastwood is magnificent and the story is relevant to a certain current events debate (WaRniNg: clicking this link will give away what was – for me at least - a significant surprise turn in the flick).

the story is touching … scratch that, it’s heart wrenching. watching the movie on the return flight from paris, i had to shield my face because i was CrYiNg on the plane. a little embarrassed, i spent a few minutes after the movie ended looking around the plane to see if i was the only one. there were others covering their faces.

what’s in your netflix queue?


welcome summer

today the northern hemisphere enjoys the longest day and shortest night of the year. how will you kick off summer? according the reuters, nearly 21,000 people stood at stonehenge to watch the summer solstice sunrise. in the old days, people celebrated summer – and the first harvest – as a time to relax after a long season of labor. june weddings, summer vacation, pride festivals… maybe the wilds of summer are what give juliette lewis - who celebrates her 32nd birthday today - her untamed charm.

let the revelry begin ...


saving sesame street

it's almost unbearable to imagine interrupting the count's '1, ah, ah, ah ...' with advertising for bratz or grover's visual interpretation of near and far with :30 spots peddling the latest barbi wares. but it could happen if congress makes good on a threat to slash the public broadcasting budget. let the folks on the hill know that funding for widely accessible, educational, commercial-free programming deserves our tax dollars. as always, our friends at make it easy.


rude awakenings

when they said the paris air show is non-stop, they weren't kidding. after 12 hours at the show, there is a mad dash to the hotel to change into a dress and go to a media dinner. and of course at midnight, there's more work to be done to prepare for the next day. fortunately, the city has a lot of energy, and lates nights seem better when surrounded by such life and history.

the other day, when i finally poured myself into bed the tv was on to fill the dead air. around 3:30am i woke to the sound of a woman gasping and moaning in delight. in that stage between waking and dreaming - clearly not fully present - i thought, "that's right". but what could have been a great dream took a turn for the worse. when my eyes focused, i saw the tv. sure for some it's great that paris is such a free city, but waking out of a dead sleep to the sight of a woman perfofellatioelatio isn't my cup of tea. it's no wonder i missed the 5:30am wake up call.

i can't wait to leave tomorrow. and i can't wait to come back for a proper visit.



welcome to paris. there’s really nothing like sitting in a room full of people and being the only american, the only one who doesn’t speak portuguese and/or french, the only vegetarian and (so far as i can tell) the only gay person. it’s amazing how easy it is to appear engaged even without knowing a word of what they’re saying. after many hours of this, i escaped to walk around the city a bit, do what little sightseeing i could, and grab a bite to eat at my own pace. i wandered along the seine, saw notre dame, the louvre, the eiffel tower (from a distance) and lots of life in paris. it is a beautiful and busy city.

toward the end of the evening i found myself (as i often do when traveling for work) in the 'gay’ section of town. (does anyone else do this?) after spending hours with people i know, but with whom i am only linked to through work, finding the closest gay bar feels oddly like home. it was no different here. it only took a few minutes for a couple of gay boys to take me under their wing.

it’s nearly midnight here on sunday. and just around 6pm at home. the air show opens tomorrow morning. it’s sure to be three days of absolute mayhem.


and countries beyond

when i arrived at the american airlines check-in desk at mia they didn’t have my reservation … that’s because i’m flying air france to paris. i’m headed to the paris air show for work. it’s a bit of a misnomer. the show is in le bourget, which is a bit outside of the city. le bourget is where lindbergh landed. next week the airport will be transformed into a small city dedicated to aviation complete with temporary buildings three times the size of my apartment. if i can snap any interesting photos, i'll be sure to share them.

on a different note - good luck to the girls playing the softball tournament this weekend ... hopefully arlene won't postpone your victory.


drive thru doc

so i went to the dermatologist today for the first time since i was a pimply high school girl. i had a list of potential issues i ticked through with him; and i kid you not, this guy checked, diagnosed and sent me on my way faster than mcdonald’s can say ‘may i take your order’. in the interest of learning from each other’s experiences, let’s talk warts. that’s right- wart. i am not ashamed (yet):

me: and … i have this other … *thing*.
doc: what kind of thing?
me: well, a wart.
doc: how bad does that wart bother you? because it rEaLLy hurts to take those off. eventually it will fall off on its own and it isn’t contagious.
me: b u t c a n ‘ t t h e y s p r e a d ?
doc: if it hasn’t already ... you’re probably fine.


reconciling god & gay

last night i attended an hrc panel on faith & fairness with leaders of first congregationalist, universalist unitarian and reform judaism congregations. it was basically a discussion about reconciling god & gay - both personally and politically. i wasn't conscious of my attire until i stepped out of the car and found myself scanning others' dress. the blazer made me nervous, but the guy in shorts and running shoes made me feel overdressed (whew!). it was mildly strange stepping back into a church and doing so of my own accord. the sanctuary was made of beautiful wooden arches and a pipe organ filled the silence. i must admit i was a little choked up.

rather than a full on report, i thought i'd share a few pieces of particular interest ...
::this is great -
::be on the lookout for a full-length film called for the bible tells me so that confronts the use of scripture by "agents of hate". it includes gems like "there's nothing wrong with a fifth grade understanding of the bible ... as long as you're in the fifth grade."
::when asked to define god, the rabbi said (and i paraphrase) god is "shalom" which he said comes from a word meaning 'wholeness' and faith in god must bring wholeness to all people. i love this.
::the methodist church has a policy founded upon the combined authority of scripture, tradition, experience and reason, rather than absolute strict interpretation of the bible.
:: successful civil rights movements were only successful after engaging communities of faith.

while there has been some progress for gay inclusion in individual congregations, the political climate seems to be backsliding. the hrc field organizer pointed out that we didn't necessarily choose the discussion about gay marriage, but now we're in a position where we must defend it. so i wonder - is the right to marry really the critical next step?


hollywood hearts & hoaxes

listen, i hate to break it to the dedicated people mag/us weekly readers, but high-profile hollywood romances are fabricated. what better publicity than a well-timed, believable falling - be it in or out. let’s consider a few recent examples:

::tom cruise professes his undying love for katie holmes to everyone who will listen and publish … the lovebirds are each promo-ing new movies – batman and war of the worlds - with no believable candidates for on-set romance so they paired up
::ben and jlo were the couple (gigli, jersey girl) until he picked another jen (garner, they co-starred in daredevil)
::brad’s love affair with angelina … mr. & mrs. smith debuts this week

i have hope this rule does not apply across the board … tim robbins + susan sarandon = true love

instead of waiting for the tabloids to tell us, let’s guess who the next hot couple will be ...



in honor of lindsay’s birthday, and her mild celebrity obsession, a list of a few famous people who share today’s birth date.

today …
:actor, robert englund, aka freddie krueger is 56.
:actress-comedian and former madonna-lover, sandra bernhhard is 50.
:comedian, colin quinn is 46.
:doogie howser’s best friend (max casella) is 38.
:sideways star paul giamatti is 38.
:kid rock sidekick, uncle kracker is 31.

and a notable follow up - tomorrow prince will be 47.

lindsay is officially 29. any words of wisdom to share with her about the last year of her 20s?


scenes from lindsay's birthday beach bash

birthday girl Posted by Hello


rain, rain, go away

rain rain, go away
we need sunshine saturday

all signs point to rain tomorrow – could be a damper for lindsay’s beach birthday party.

does anyone know any prayers, spells or rain dances for sending the rain away?


f.ound o.pposition 4 r.einforcing d.iversity

a 'christian' activist group has launched a campaign against ford for it’s pro-diversity policies and because it’s advertising to capitalize on this lucrative niche market. the best part -- the ‘anti’-ford site provides a load of reasons to support the company. those folks are calling for action, why not shoot ford a quick email (or via hrc) to say thanks.


dark america

worth reading: today’s column from thomas friedman ponders a question that isn’t new, but he offers the penetrating perspective that “where birds don't fly, people don't mix, ideas don't get sparked, friendships don't get forged, stereotypes don't get broken, and freedom doesn't ring.”

verbal vomit

it's not even 8:30am and i've learned several lessons (again):

1. those one-line retorts that sound so dead right in your head are often not. they are selfish, childish, hurtful and above all, completely counter productive to their intended purpose.

2. when someone genuinely says 'i'm sorry', a caring response is generally the best response.

3. just because you desperately want to make something right, right now doesn't mean you don't still have to go to work.

** heaviest of heavy sighs **